Animals I Hate

Flamingos are big ol’ pink birds. They have stupid scoop bills so they can go in and eat all the shrimp before anyone else. They eat so much shrimp that they turn pink. They don’t even care! They don’t care about you, they don’t care about the shrimp. They only care about eating so many shrimps that they change their damn color. Hey flamingos, it’s called Manic Panic and it only costs twelve freaking dollars. Maybe save some shrimp for someone else. Science thinks that they stand on one leg like that because they can do a thing where only half of their body goes to sleep at a time, which is pretty convenient, because one half of their body can always be eating all of the motherfucking shrimp.