Animals I Hate

Porcupines are big ol’ spiney rats. When I was a kid my grandpa used to terrify me by telling me how porcupines could shoot their quills at a target across the room, but this is crazy for a few reasons. First: Why? Why would they do that? If you wait until some dog has got his nose right in your belly, that is a guaranteed hit. Two: Why would I be afraid of porcupines? I lived in Ohio when I was a kid. Ohio does not have a porcupine problem, especially not indoor porcupines who attack children from across rooms. Three: Why would you even WANT to scare a little kid! What the hell grandpa?! I thought we were cool! But anyway, porcupines DO have spiny quills that will become dislodged if you touch them, and sometimes dogs want to be friends with a porcupine and then they have to go to the dog emergency room and it’s real sad. 

(Aw gosh I’m real sorry about all this, it’s just I got an iPad 2 for Christmas and this is literally the first time I’ve been on a regular computer since, and I’m having a lot of trouble thinking about animals because I’m too worried about what’s going in in Tiny Tower. Animals I Hate will resume daily posting January 1. Pinky swear!)